what post?

so at some point in the past week i felt-for the first time since i started this blog-that i didn't have anything to write about. and i cast about a little bit, found something, and then the weekend came with the soccer tournament and so i wrote about that. but i am online for the third time today, and i have avoided posting a blog because i just wasn't feeling it.

I was telling someone the other day that I expected of myself some great and profound literary work, each time I put something up. But I haven't felt funny or satirical, and although I have had a couple thoughts about posts I haven't been able to make more than a paragraph out of any of them. And somehow I twisted that into being resentful at the people I love who are reading these...as if it was their fault that I had such a high expectation of myself and didn't feel like I could meet it.

So this is my post about NOT posting...because I don't know what the hell to write, and I don't need any comment or assurance just needed to write it. Love you all and thanks for everything.