Tuesday, July 15, 2008

sometimes


I just feel like saying forget it.
Who am I?
Why in the world do I owe you anything?
Did I promise you something?
Because I don't remember that...
We are all giving to each other all the time...
and sometimes I am so damn sick of you expecting another gift
Yeah, it's too much to ask
No, I can't spend all my time with you
Not even a little bit
It is time to make some choices in my life
So sorry for wanting to be happy
I hate that you are inconvenienced by my happiness
Really
It's tearing me up
The messed up part is--
It does tear me up
I hate this feeling
I am not responsible for you and your
sickness
I just want the clarity I felt once before
to be present on a regular basis
why can't you just be happy?
why in the world do you insist that i be a part of it?
i can't do that for anyone else
God knows I've tried

2 comments:

sonya said...

amen. seriously. this is where i often am recently; i have a friend who is so needy right now that i'm losing track of my own needs and whether they are important and where whatever balance there is may be

JustMe said...

i just want to clarify that I am talking about "you" in the global sense of every fucking person in the world. my brother asked me if there is a certain person i was thinking of...no...there are like five certain people I am thinking of...and that's just to get started...

i think the good news is...(sonya)... that this is just another stage... this too shall pass.